It starts with a small thing, really. A little insult. An angry look. A smirk.
The first offense.
You smile, you look it over, and you forgive.
Years later, you are so much older, and you have had to repeat this process a thousand times. So very many times. You have forgiven. Over and over again. Sometimes, you have had to talk to the person who has hurt you. Sometimes, they have repented. Sometimes, they haven't. It doesn't matter anymore to you, though, because an apology means very little. Corrected behavior does.
Right at that time, the person you thought would never hurt you does. And it is excruciating. What do you do?
You smile, you look it over, and you forgive.
70 times 7, right?
Years pass again. You are older and starting to wonder when you'll see your first gray hair. You have a new set of friends now, and things are different with them. Or so you think.
Then, it happens again. You are betrayed. You are wounded.
You retreat. You pray. You cry. You ask God what to do.
You smile, you forgive, but you don't look it over.
Years pass again. You are afraid of friendships. You wonder if people even know the meaning of them anymore. They have forgotten the verse, "A friend loves (is loyal) at all times." Proverbs 17:17 You wonder if we are living in the last days and everyone's "love has grown cold." Matthew 24:12
You aren't sure, but you aren't willing to look over things anymore. If someone proves themselves not to be your friend, you believe them. Why pretend?
Now, you are even older. You are starting to wonder if there really is any gray or maybe you see a gray hair or two. You no longer believe in friendship (at least, the way the Bible says it should be), but you still are trying to show people the love of Jesus.
Again, a little insult, an angry look, or a smirk. It's that age old cycle again. This time, you don't even really feel an offense. You wonder why it keeps happening again and again, but you don't hate the person. You wonder what it is about you that would make them be so hateful, but you try to show them the love of Jesus anyway.
You smile, you forgive, and you move on. You are past looking things over. You've learned about boundaries and continuing to be yourself despite the meanness of others. You have learned that you didn't want the friendship of the hardhearted bully anyway. Who would want to be friends with them?
You are fine with yourself. You like yourself.
And now, it doesn't matter who likes you or not. Then, you realize, "He who began a good work in you" has completed it. That is, He is completing it. You are being sanctified through this process, and even though it didn't feel good, you have come out on the other side an even better person.
Despite the facade of fakes you have endured your whole life, you have not only won the battle, but you have won the war.
